Does any one else just get tired? I'm tired cause sleep is hard to come by for me, I never get to sleep more than an hour at a time. I'm tired of never getting to go anywhere, we are kind of stuck in a rut....we haven't been able to go camping,I miss that soooo much. Tired of never having the funds to do much of anything.Tired of wondering if we will ever get more names that our stake can do for indexing, or if we'll make the goals that have been set. Tired of hoping and wishing for all of our children to have jobs and a way to provide for thier families. Tired of wanting to be more fit...trying to figure out when I can get a grip on me to do what I need to do ,to be more healthy.Tired of trying to figure out what animals to let in the house at what time,because they don't all tolerate each other. Tired of being alone every morning until 1:30 in the afternoon,with no one to talk to ,and trying to make sure my dogs don't bark and wake up my sweetie, cause he's worked through all the early morning hours. Tired of crying cause I feel like I'm a lost cause. I miss being happy, and having friends I can talk to.
Now with all that said...I want you to know we are blessed ,we have a home, transportation, a great ward and my parents right next door. I love St.George, even though some of my children describe this town as hot as hell. I still think it's an awesome place to live, and I especially love it from Sept to June ,cause the weather is PERFECT! Being next door to Dad and Dockie makes it so we get to see my brother and sisters alot, cause they when they come to see Dad, they stop off and see us too, I love it!
I guess I'm just feeling a little down and needed to vent...I guess now I can go back to my indexing and see if there are any projects I can do!
3 comments:
Yes, Im tired! Tired ofof not having a home, of living with people who can hardly wait for us to leave, for never having any money, and when I do someone takes it away. Tired of not being able to say things for fear of hurting people i love! For crying all the damn time. I hate it. To bad I dont have any blessing to speak of that you do! I love you mom! Im sorry Im worthless and cant find a place for my kitties, I really am trying!
This post makes me sad, and I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry that life isn't easy for you right now, and that you feel lonely. I would come hang out with you in the mornings if I didn't live 10 hours away, but you know you could always call right? I love you mom, please don't be sad.
And Kim, I know life is really hard for you too, but you do have blessings. You just have to look a little harder to see them. You have four beautiful, healthy children, a husband who loves you, and even if you feel like Jesse's family can't wait for you to leave, they are still providing you with a place to stay, which is better than being homeless. Sometimes when things get really difficult you just have to look for the positives in life, because the negatives will just bring you farther down.
I love both of you guys!
Love you mom, sorry your lonely! I wish you lived closer too! Some people can handle that heat and some people can't, I can't even handle the heat in salt lake, I get so irritable that I can't even stand myself. I know I will be a happier person when I find a cooler climate to live in but I also need to see the sun I don't like dreary, cloudy, sunless days. I get lonely and tired sometimes too, and frustrated by my situation, but if sit down and stress and worry about then it will never change. So I try to always keep on moving, work my butt off and give my best everyday and as long as I am living a good honest life God will take care of the rest. I can honestly say for the most part I am HAPPY, I miss our family and my siblings but I have 4 little monsters to keep me busy and make me laugh, cry, and want to pull all my hair out, and I must kind of like it because I am about to add another one to the mix. Love you tons and hope you can find happiness!
Kimi, I have to agree with Chelle on this one, count your blessings, name them one by one, and it will surprise you! Plus, you know you always got me, I am a blessing, right??? Love ya Kimi!
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